It is incorrect to state that the ABA and eBird are not in charge of English names.
As mentioned above, eBird represents the Clements list. Clements differs from AOS currently and has in the past. For example, Clements currently recognizes Western Cattle Egret while AOS does not; there was a disparity in recognition of Mexican Duck as a species for awhile, and there are differences in common names - notably Eurasian/Common Moorhen, Gray-headed/Purple Swamphen, some hyphen differences, and whatnot.
For a number of years, ABA has quietly favored Clements/eBird over AOS taxonomy and nomenclature. Here is the current ABA checklist:
ThemeNcode PDF Viewer [Do not Delete] - American Birding Association
There is a note at the top that states "Note that where discrepancies in names occur between Clements/eBird and the AOS, both are listed, that of AOS in parentheses."
It is true that both organizations have stated that they will follow AOS's eponym changes, just as the AOS has stated they will make these changes that you are trying to have them reconsider. The ABA and Clements may also find reason to reconsider. It is certainly a possibility that Clements could decide not to implement or to only partially implement any changes. It is certainly possible that ABA could either choose to align more closely than Clements or to present multiple names instead of wholly adopting AOS. I say "certainly possible" because all of those things are occurring currently - and that needs to be emphasized.
I don't think enough credence is given to the consideration that even if the AOS does propose changes, that does not mean that others will adopt them - and there are consequences and ramifications for that which both "sides" of this argument should be considering. Whether we are talking about IOC, eBird, ABA (either the organization or the membership), ornithological journals, 60% (possibly) of birders, or just people with strong political opinions - there is already precedent for rejection on changes of a much smaller stakes and scale.